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Tuesday, February 14, 2012

"My Story" Tuesday: Kathi Macias, Author of NO GREATER LOVE series.

(Note from Anne: Kathi's story of how she made that step from nominal to dedicated Christian stirs me from hair follicle to toenail. I hope it will touch your heart, too.)

Kathi:
I was not raised in a Christian home, though I thought I was a Christian and if anyone had asked, I would certainly have said I was. I assumed because I was born in America and my mom was once a Catholic and my German grandmother talked about her “Yesus” (Jesus) in her heart, that we too must be Christians.

In addition, I lived in a time when we still did the actual Christmas story at school. I even played the part of Mary in third grade, and one of the first passages of Scripture I memorized was Luke 2, as I heard it repeated so many times during rehearsals. I also went to church with friends anytime they invited me, so I had a smattering of Catholic, Baptist, Pentecostal, and nearly every other denominational teaching during my growing up years.

When I was fifteen I thought I wanted to be a nun and convinced my parents to let me live in a convent for a while. One Sunday afternoon when I entered the chapel for Benediction, I was struck by the fact that during normal mass we genuflected (knelt) on one knee upon entering the chapel but on two for Benediction. I asked a nun why and she said it was because during Benediction, Christ was present on the altar. Because I believed that Christ was the Son of God, I was blown away at the thought.

It was the first time I’d sensed my own sinful condition, and I thought, “If Christ is truly present on the altar, genuflecting on two knees won’t make me worthy to come into His presence. I could throw myself on my face and it wouldn’t be enough.” Discouraged and dismayed, I left the chapel and the convent and didn’t return to church for years—not because I didn’t believe in God or the basic tenets of the Christian Church (as best I knew them), but rather because I did and I felt hopeless to meet the requirements.

Approximately ten years later, with my marriage in trouble and feeling like a total failure, I called my mother (who, along with my brothers, had become a Christian by then) and told her of my troubles. She said one clear thing: “You need Jesus.” After I hung up I knelt beside my bed to pray.

It was the first time I saw anything close to a vision. In my mind’s eye I pictured myself on a crowded, dusty street. People were craning their necks to see something. Many were weeping or crying out. I looked to see what they were looking at, and I saw Jesus, stumbling toward me, carrying His cross.

I too began to weep, and as He drew up even with me, He stopped and looked up. I saw the blood and sweat on His face and body, but all I could focus on were His eyes as He looked past everyone else and straight at me. Then He said five words that changed my life forever: “I did it for you.”

That’s when I understood that I had been right those many years ago in that little convent chapel. There truly was nothing I could do to make myself worthy to come into God’s presence, but now I understood that Jesus had already done it for me.

That was July 5, 1974.

6 comments:

Kathi Macias said...

Thank you so much for posting this, Anne. You are such a blessing!

Pat Rowland said...

What a beautiful testimony. When God allows us a vision, it does life-transforming things like nothing else. It underscores the truth that Jesus is alive and with us every day. Thank you for sharing this powerful testimony.

Anne Baxter Campbell said...

No, Kathi--thank you. You're the one who is the blessing, speaking from one of your greatest fan's viewpoint...

Pat--yes, it is a beautiful testimony, and yes, a vision is, well, beyond anything other than conversion in making a difference in a person's life. One I had not terribly long after my own conversion sustained me during a pretty rough patch.

Cass Wessel said...

Absolutely, Kathi. Nothing we can do is ever enough. Only what Jesus already did matters. And that is more than enough. Blessings and thanks for sharing, Cass

Tanja Charlotte said...

Beautiful story indeed!!! ❤ Grateful for Christ'a love for us!!!

rsctt603 said...

Great Story!!! thank you for sharing!!

www.wayfarersquest-rsctt.blogspot.com